Molly & Indy, reading

May roundup

A roundup of miscellaneous pictures from May:

Clara mopping:

Sofi on bike to work day (I took the train to Martinez, then biked):

Backyard picnic with Hawa and Ana:

Clara helping Olivia give out samples at the farmers market:

Many bus rides:

Molly at the book store:

Molly & Mama:

Clara at the old state capitol in Benicia:

80's mix challenge

We use a service called subsonic to play music, and we have an 80's mix (the name is a lie, there are songs from other decades too). Recently I've been playing it over, and over, and over, so Clara decided to play the whole mix and see how many songs I could guess the name of. If you were alive during the eighties, this is my challenge for you: listen to the mix (http://tuchus.subsonic.org/share/YduaF) as many times as you want to. Then get someone to tally the number of songs you can guess. Try to beat my record of 34 out of 53. Just a suggustion...but if you complete this challenge, put it in the comments.

-Molly

Mother's Day, and Remembering my Mother

This will be my first mother's day without my mother. Mary died in late February of complications from an extended illness. She was 71. And I was not prepared. Or, rather, I see now that there is no way to be emotionally prepared for a parent's death (or anyone's death?).

My mother was a child of the American West: she grew up in Salt Lake City, exploring the Wasatch mountains with friends, raising goats with her neighbor, and getting into mischief at her Catholic boarding school. Her parents came from families that came to Salt Lake City looking for opportunity. Her dad's side immigrated in the early 1900's from northern Italy to work in the mining industry. Mary's mother's parents migrated from the southeast around the same time, living in Arkansas and Oklahoma before settling in Utah.

Mary (center) with two of her siblings.

Mary went to Gonzaga University in Washington State, and told me stories of spending summers with her school friends working in cabbage fields in California to make money. She joined the Peace Corps and travelled to Afghanistan to teach English. After the Peace Corps she spent time living in New York (where she met Dieter), San Francisco, back in Salt Lake City (where Mary & Dieter got married), Berlin, and finally settling in the DC area (where my brother and I were born). She taught English as a second language for several decades, then worked as an school administrator for the County School System's ESOL program until she retired and moved to California to be near Molly & Clara (and me!).

Teaching in Afghanistan

Woven through all this are tales of mischief, tragedy, adventure, creativity, and love. So much love. Love for her from other people, and love for others from her. None of us are perfect, but Mary's continued perseverance in the face of difficulty, and the love and joy she radiated to those around her  is what stays with me. In spite of her decades of struggle, and numerous tragedies, Mary was a bright spot for many people, including me. I had a front-row seat to watching her struggle, and a front-row seat to being inspired by her strength, beauty, and amazing kindness and love.

bringing joy through music

Universally, the people who have reached out to me after Mary's death have told me stories of how she brought them love and joy. From simple stories of neighbors who recalled talking to her as she gardened in her front yard, to old friends and colleagues who told me stories of the care she took with her students and co-workers.

Processing her death for me has been buoyed by amazing support from family, friends and neighbors, and complicated by an evolving relationship with my brother brother. The relationship with my father has grown deeper as we navigated the last moths with Mary and the first months without her. I am deeply thankful for this. Sadly, my relationship with my brother has grown more limited and distant as we react very differently to the loss of our mother. I hope time will heal us both.

Mary loved deeply, was loved deeply, and is missed even more deeply, but I know now that she will be remembered by those who knew her and has made the world a better place. And that is quite an inspiration. 

As always, I promise (and hope to fulfill this promise!) more pictures of my mother from over the years. But today I want to post pictures of her in her mother role. She was much more than just my mother, but in honor of this holiday, here she is supporting me through the years. 

the family at my college graduation

the family at my grad school graduation

Nouri Sofi Mary

Sofi Mary Nouri

Sofi Mary Nouri

Sofi Mary

Nouri Mary Sofi

Sofi Mary Nouri in Yellowstone

Dancer Sofi Mary at Meadowbrook Horse Show

Sofi Mary

Mary with grandkids and Franklins at Family Camp

Clara Mary Molly

Molly Clara Mary in her garden

Daisy

One bright spot these past few months has been the office dog at my new job. She's this lovely old mutt with just the right combination of genuine affection and total mellowness. When I'm having a bad/sad/tough day, the kids always ask if I get to see Daisy the next time I go to the office. 

And today, not only did I get to see her, but my boss trusted me to hang out with her while he went to a meeting. AND I got to take her for a walk. I might have been a bit more excited than she was, but she's pretty easy going and went along with my picture taking. She does like to stop and smell the flowers! :) 

Grand gals chillin'